Should I Stay or Should I Go?

How do you know when to stick with your job and when to call it quits?  Everyone has faced this question at some point in their career, and it can be really hard to know when it is time to move on.  On one hand, you could quit prematurely and miss out on great opportunity or accomplishment had you just stuck with it a little longer.  On the other hand, sometimes people endure a miserable situation for far too long, fearing the unknown.  If you are pondering this tough question, here are some signals to help you decide…should I stay or should I go? 

 Stick with it if…

…you haven’t been doing it very long.   Learning curves are uncomfortable, and who wants to be uncomfortable?  The language is foreign (just how many acronyms do you need, people?), the systems are new, and you haven’t really gotten to know your coworkers yet.  Give it a chance and see if you feel differently once things start to feel more natural.

…you aren’t seeing results right away.  Be reasonable and give yourself some grace.  What you are trying to accomplish may take a long time to come to fruition.  You can’t turn a ship on a dime, nor can you change a culture, break bad habits, or implement a new way of doing things overnight. 

…you messed up.  It can be tempting to run if you make a mistake, but the best lessons are ones learned the hard way.  Own it and learn from it.

…you are in a hard season, but it is not always that way.  You will go through tough times.  A hectic year end, a downturn that results in layoffs, a project that requires you to sacrifice personal time, a challenging staff issue.  Just remember – this too shall pass.  Buckle down and get through it, and then give yourself a well-deserved break when you come out the other side.

…you don’t like your boss/coworkers but you haven’t really tried to make it better.  You are not going to like and get along with everyone, but if you haven’t tried to talk through differences or find a way to work together, then you would just be running from one problem to the next (because it will also likely happen at your next employer).  If your coworker interacts with you in a way you don’t like, then respectfully talk to them about it!  They may have no idea that it was bothering you.  If your boss never responds to your emails, then ask her what her what is the best way to get her attention (and follow through on what she says).  Try to see things from the other person’s perspective and make a good effort to get along with them before you throw in the towel.

It may be time to move on if…

…the light at the end of the tunnel is a mirage.  If you are always stressed and always behind and there is never any reprieve, you will have to decide if it will eventually get better or if that can is just going to keep getting kicked down the road.  Hint: it won’t get better on its own.  If you cannot implement an intentional plan to fix the root cause of the issues that create the less than favorable situation you are in, then it is likely time to move on.

…the job is taking a physical toll on your body.  If the stress of the job is causing your blood pressure to stay at an unhealthy level, or you can’t sleep, you have constant headaches, your breathing is shallow, etc. – either find a way to manage the physical impacts of the stress or move on.  No one who had a stress-related heart attack would ever say that it was worth trading their health for the career accomplishments.

…you are compromising your priorities.  Think about the things that are most important to you – family, marriage, health, etc.  There may be seasons when you have to rearrange your priorities out of necessity, but ideally it is just that – a season.  If what you say is most important does not match up with how you spend your time in the long run, then it’s time to take a hard look at what you can do to bring your priorities back into alignment – whether at your current job or by looking for something that will give you better balance.    

…you are being asked to compromise your values.  This one is pretty cut and dry.  If your values don’t match up with those of your boss or your organization, then hold your head high as you walk (or maybe run) away.  You will never regret doing the right thing and standing up for your beliefs.

…you don’t like your boss/coworkers and you have tried to make it better.  I’m sure you have heard the popular saying that people don’t leave bad organizations; they leave bad bosses.  Your boss, or the people you spend 8+ hours a day with, can make or break your work life.  If you have put in a good faith effort to talk through your differences and to see it from their perspective, it might be time to cut your losses and move on.  You will likely never find a perfect boss, but there are lots of really great bosses out there.  Don’t settle for less!

Gray area: Stop and reflect if…

…you dread going to work each day.  Identify the reasons and see what is within your power to change, or at least have an open conversation about it.  If everyone else is to blame for your dreadful job, then the thing you may need to change is your attitude (I’m just saying).  Neither your situation nor your attitude will magically get better on its own, so make an intentional effort to improve things before you start looking for something else. 

…you want to leave but don’t want to quit on something you set out to accomplish.  Leaving a job before you have finished a project or achieved what you set out to do can easily feel like a failure.  You will have to do some soul searching to find out what is behind that fear of failure, and then determine if it is of noble enough cause to stay the course.  (Hint: pride is not a noble enough cause.)  Don’t kid yourself and think that you are the only one who can save the day.  It might just be that your role was to start in motion something that someone else was meant to complete. 

…you want more (more responsibility, money, freedom, etc.), and they simply do not have more to give.  If it is money or title you are after, think about why.  Would getting it really fulfill you?  Have you added enough value to justify that bump?  If not, look for ways to take initiative instead of waiting for something to come along.  Network inside and outside of your company.  Join a board or volunteer – not only is it fulfilling, but also a great way to meet people as well.  Consider taking a class or self-learning a new and relevant skill, which will satisfy your need for more and also make you a more valuable employee! 

…your job has a trade-off.  You are bored at work, but really love the flexibility in your schedule.  You work long hours, but you are paid very well.  You don’t like your boss, but you love your coworkers.  You aren’t finding opportunity at your organization, but you have built up several weeks of vacation you don’t want to lose by leaving.  Decide what is important to you in this stage of life and whether or not the trade-off is worth it.  Oftentimes we decide before even looking that we will not find that perk anywhere else, so we stay somewhere we are less than happy to keep it.  You may not find an employer that is perfect and checks every box on your list, but do not rule out the possibility that another employer may check more boxes than what you have right now.

Should I stay or should I go is usually not an easy decision, and it requires reflection, intentionality, and courage to take the right next steps.  If you choose to do nothing you can expect to receive the same results, so one way or the other something needs to change.  Whether that change is in you, within your current role, a new role within your organization, or a completely fresh start is up to you!